Runcible Blog

What a super night I'm having. I'm typing this from the porcelain throne because I ate some crazy stuff. Let's see, I had:

• 2 donuts for breakfast
• microwaveable macaroni and cheese for lunch, with diet lemonade (only because I didn't realize it was diet)
• a cheese on wheat bread sandwich for a 3:00 snack
• a bag of popcorn...
• grapes, to counteract the popcorn
• oreos, just moments ago.

Now I'm feeling a little bloated. And I've got to do something about this looming pot belly...Some of my pairs of pants are getting tighter (granted, they were just the right size with no room when I bought them). I tell myself that I'll be back to my mongoose-like physique when spring rolls around. (haha. spring rolls! gross)

Watching Alien vs. Predator a little while ago probably also contributed to my sick stomach. The movie isn't gory, but the acting, dialog, and plot are excruciating. It's like Turner and Hooch meets Pacman. The $65,000,000 budget seems to have gone to waste -- the action sequences show black blobs (the aliens and the predators) bouncing off each other in the dark at 3 frames per second. I can only assume that something exciting was happening.

I knew the movie was widely regarded as a dud, but I rented it anyway because, hey, it's ALIEN vs. PREDATOR! Unfortunately, all the critics were right, and I just blew $5.

Rewinding a bit, when I got out of my car at Blockbuster, I closed the door on the cord hanging from my coat in such a way that it was stuck inside the latch. I couldn't turn the key to unlock the door. What are the chances of that?! I cut off the cord and fiddled with the lock for a while. I almost got worried because the passenger side door lock doesn't work. I would have no way of opening the door. I opened the trunk, but the pull-down seats lock from the inside. Thankfully, after carefully turning the key, I was able to unlock the door without breaking anything. Geeze.

Well, it's time to flush this thing and get back to gluttony and mindless consumption.